March 27, 2015 15:40 UTC

American Stories

Short Story: 'Luck' by Mark Twain

Multimedia

Play or download an MP3 of this story

 

SUSAN CLARK: Now, the Special English program, AMERICAN STORIES.

(MUSIC)

Our story today is called "Luck."  It was written by Mark Twain. Here is Shep O’Neal with the story.

(MUSIC)

SHEP O’NEAL:  I was at a dinner in London given in honor of one of the most celebrated English military men of his time. I do not want to tell you his real name and titles. I will just call him Lieutenant General Lord Arthur Scoresby.

I cannot describe my excitement when I saw this great and famous man. There he sat, the man himself, in person, all covered with medals. I could not take my eyes off him. He seemed to show the true mark of greatness. His fame had no effect on him. The hundreds of eyes watching him, the worship of so many people did not seem to make any difference to him.

Next to me sat a clergyman, who was an old friend of mine. He was not always a clergyman. During the first half of his life he was a teacher in the military school at Woolwich. There was a strange look in his eye as he leaned toward me and whispered – “Privately – he is a complete fool.” He meant, of course, the hero of our dinner.

This came as a shock to me. I looked hard at him. I could not have been more surprised if he has said the same thing about Nepoleon, or Socrates, or Solomon. But I was sure of two things about the clergyman. He always spoke the truth. And, his judgment of men was good. Therefore, I wanted to find out more about our hero as soon as I could.

Some days later I got a chance to talk with the clergyman, and he told me more.  These are his exact words:

About forty years ago, I was an instructor in the military academy at Woolwich, when young Scoresby was given his first examination. I felt extremely sorry for him.  Everybody answered the questions well, intelligently, while he – why, dear me – he did not know anything, so to speak. He was a nice, pleasant young man. It was painful to see him stand there and give answers that were miracles of stupidity.

I knew of course that when examined again he would fail and be thrown out. So, I said to myself, it would be a simple, harmless act to help him as much as I could.

I took him aside and found he knew a little about Julius Ceasar’s history. But, he did not know anything else. So, I went to work and tested him and worked him like a slave. I made him work, over and over again, on a few questions about Ceasar, which I knew he would be asked.

If you will believe me, he came through very well on the day of the examination.  He got high praise too, while others who knew a thousand times more than he were sharply criticized. By some strange, lucky accident, he was asked no questions but those I made him study. Such an accident does not happen more than once in a hundred years.

Well, all through his studies, I stood by him, with the feeling a mother has for a disabled child. And he always saved himself by some miracle.

I thought that what in the end would destroy him would be the mathematics examination.  I decided to make his end as painless as possible. So, I pushed facts into his stupid head for hours. Finally, I let him go to the examination to experience what I was sure would be his dismissal from school. Well, sir, try to imagine the result. I was shocked out of my mind. He took first prize! And he got the highest praise.

I felt guilty day and night – what I was doing was not right. But I only wanted to make his dismissal a little less painful for him. I never dreamed it would lead to such strange, laughable results.

I thought that sooner or later one thing was sure to happen: The first real test once he was through school would ruin him.

Then, the Crimean War broke out. I felt that sad for him that there had to be a war.  Peace would have given this donkey a chance to escape from ever being found out as being so stupid. Nervously, I waited for the worst to happen. It did. He was appointed an officer.  A captain, of all things! Who could have dreamed that they would place such a responsibility on such weak shoulders as his.

I said to myself that I was responsible to the country for this. I must go with him and protect the nation against him as far as I could. So, I joined up with him. And anyway we went to the field.

And there – oh dear, it was terrible. Mistakes, fearful mistakes – why, he never did anything that was right – nothing but mistakes. But, you see, nobody knew the secret of how stupid he really was. Everybody misunderstood his actions. They saw his stupid mistakes as works of great intelligence. They did, honestly!

His smallest mistakes made a man in his right mind cry, and shout and scream too – to himself, of course. And what kept me in a continual fear was the fact that every mistake he made increased his glory and fame. I kept saying to myself that when at last they found out about him, it will be like the sun falling out of the sky.

He continued to climb up, over the dead bodies of his superiors. Then, in the hottest moment of one battle down went our colonel. My heart jumped into my mouth, for Scoresby was the next in line to take his place. Now, we are in for it, I said…

The battle grew hotter. The English and their allies were steadily retreating all over the field. Our regiment occupied a position that was extremely important. One mistake now would bring total disaster. And what did Scoresby do this time – he just mistook his left hand for his right hand…that was all. An order came for him to fall back and support our right. Instead, he moved forward and went over the hill to the left. We were over the hill before this insane movement could be discovered and stopped. And what did we find? A large and unsuspected Russian army waiting! And what happened – were we all killed? That is exactly what would have happened in ninety-nine cases out of a hundred.  But no – those surprised Russians thought that no one regiment by itself would come around there at such a time.

It must be the whole British army, they thought. They turned tail, away they went over the hill and down into the field in wild disorder, and we after them. In no time, there was the greatest turn around you ever saw. The allies turned defeat into a sweeping and shining victory.

The allied commander looked on, his head spinning with wonder, surprise and joy.  He sent right off for Scoresby, and put his arms around him and hugged him on the field in front of all the armies. Scoresby became famous that day as a great military leader – honored throughout the world. That honor will never disappear while history books last.

He is just as nice and pleasant as ever, but he still does not know enough to come in out of the rain. He is the stupidest man in the universe.

Until now, nobody knew it but Scoresby and myself. He has been followed, day by day, year by year, by a strange luck. He has been a shining soldier in all our wars for years.  He has filled his whole military life with mistakes. Every one of them brought him another honorary title. Look at his chest, flooded with British and foreign medals. Well, sir, every one of them is the record of some great stupidity or other. They are proof that the best thing that can happen to a man is to be born lucky. I say again, as I did at the dinner, Scoresby’s a complete fool.

(MUSIC)

SUSAN CLARK: You have just heard the story "Luck."  It was written by Mark Twain and adapted for Special English by Harold Berman. Your narrator was Shep O’Neal.  Listen again next week at this same time for another American Story told in Special English on the Voice of America. This is Susan Clark.

This forum has been closed.
Comments
     
There are no comments in this forum. Be first and add one

Learn with The News

  • Marseille prosecutor Brice Robin (C) with Gen. David Galtier (R) holds a press conference in Marseille, southern France, March 26, 2015.

    Audio Prosecutor: Germanwings Co-Pilot Hid Illness

    France says it appears a Germanwings co-pilot Andreas Lubitz purposely caused the deadly crash in the French Alps Tuesday. He was alone in the cockpit when he flew the plane into the ground. Also in the news, Saudi-led airstrikes continue in Yemen; Uganda warns of possible al-Shabab attacks. More

  • Video NASA to Study Astronaut on Yearlong Mission in Space

    US astronaut Scott Kelly is scheduled to go to the International Space Station for a second time. Scientists hope the yearlong mission will provide important information about the physical and mental effects of living in space for a long period and pave the way for a future piloted flight to Mars. More

  • Nigeria Violence

    Audio UN: African Nations Should Change 'Pursuit' Laws

    Officials say terrorism suspects are escaping by fleeing across national borders. Police are often not permitted to follow them. The United Nations wants to keep terrorists from fleeing to safety by crossing into another country. | As It Is More

  • French prosecutor of Marseille Brice Robin, flanked by General David Galtier (R), speaks to the press on March 26, 2015 in Marignane airport near the French southern city of Marseille.

    Audio French Official: Co-Pilot 'Deliberately' Crashed Plane

    French officials say they have gathered usable sound recording from the black box of the airplane that crashed in France Tuesday. Also in the news, Afghan President Ashraf Ghani addresses the U.S. Congress; Houthi militia in Yemen capture airport in Aden; Italy arrests three men for ISIS recruiting More

  • Audio More Assertive Japan Before Abe's US Visit

    Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe is making plans for a state visit to the United States. Mr. Abe will travel to Washington next month for talks with President Barack Obama. The two leaders are expected to discuss a number of issues, including the security alliance between their countries. More

Featured Stories

  • Video Angelina Jolie Has Second Surgery to Prevent Cancer

    The 39-year-old actress published a piece in The New York Times about her decision to have her ovaries and fallopian tubes removed to protect herself from cancer. She had a double mastectomy two years ago for the same reason. The latest surgery leaves the mother of six unable to have more children. More

  • Space Rocket to Launch Weather Satellite Into Deep Space

    Video Satellite Will Watch Sun Storms, Send Warnings to Earth

    Strong storms on the sun can cause problems for satellites, radio communications and even airplane travel. A satellite is now traveling 1.5 million kilometers to enter the sun’s orbit, just in time to observe the extreme weather on the sun at its most violent time the sun’s 11-year cycle. More

  • An employee plays the game Flappy Bird at a smartphone store in Hanoi, Feb. 10, 2014.

    Audio Too Much Gaming is a Pain in the Neck

    Smartphones and other electronic devices, or gadgets, are becoming more affordable. Children in India are using them more and more. Doctors say children who spend long hours playing video games are increasingly showing signs of physical deformities, meaning their bodies are not growing properly. More

  • Video Secrets of a Saddle-Maker

    People began riding horses thousands of years ago. Saddles for horseback riding were invented soon after. Today, many companies manufacture saddles. But it is rare to find someone who designs and makes these products by hand. American Keith Valley is one of the few. More

  • Video Graphene: The Material of the 21st Century

    Graphene is a type of graphite mineral. Experts often call it 'The Material of the 21st Century' because of its special properties. Some U.S. companies are already using graphene for new technology products. Graphene is often described as a one-atom-thick layer of carbon. More

Practice Your Writing

Confessions of an English Learner blog
Confessions of an English Learner blog

 

 

 

Tell us About Our Programs